Monday, May 14

So I Was Thinking...

  • Why does the printer jam and/or run out of ink and/or paper and draw a crowd in the middle of the one page prohibited coupon and not the 175 page work-related document?
  • Is there an "Old" Zealand?
  • Why is it that doctors will call in scripts for narcotics but adamantly insist upon an office visit in order to distribute cold sore remedies?
    • Why is it that when you eat a whole pizza people are like "wow, you were hungry" but when you eat a whole cake people are like "wow, you have a problem"? It's breakfast, I can't have cake. I'll have a muffin! Yeah cause you can't have cake for breakfast. Unless it's a pancake. How'd that slide through? Young man, you're not having cake for breakfast, you're having friend batter with syrup for breakfast!
  • There are two kinds of people in this world; The kind that don't scratch the itch that they're not supposed to and the kind that know that "Dr." stands for "FULL OF SHIT" and stick long and luscious plastic knives down their casts.
  • Does "Buttafucco" mean what I suspect it means?
  • For years my neighbors have flat out, stone cold ignored me when I say hello in the halls or the streets. Yeah, I'll admit that it burns. Now why is it that in the pool locker room when everyone is naked do they suddenly wish to chat?
  • I detest most people.
  • It was not wise for me to join the building's social committee.
  • There is not necessarily any less drama at the other end of the spectrum.
  • Why isn't Ari Gold naked more often?
  • The rapture and excitement that abounds over an impending vacation can not be contained by a mere fiberglass elbow shackle!

The best buzz I've had in ages!

12 comments:

HippieChyck said...

i love the people who detest people.

Beakerz said...

It's not people I hate per se, it's just all the stupid actions they persist in forcing upon us 'normal' people

DaGince said...

I detest the people who don't love detesting people...keep the hate training rolling people. K whats up with the rotary saw?

BeautifulDisaster said...

Amen to Ari Gold nakedness!!!

Madame M. said...

"Friend" batter? Is that what you get when you get two Buttafuocos together?

Oh, and there is an original Zealand (just like an original Jersey):

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zealand

Beakerz said...

Is Ari a hottie or something? I mean, he seems cute but someone you wanna see naked?

Rebecca said...

I have to say, given my own broken bone experiences, be VERY careful sticking stuff down your cast. I stuck pencils down there to scratch and wound up screwing up my padding. Gave me a nasty bruise. Luckily it was right before the cast was coming off anyways, but otherwise, I might have needed a new one... (I mean, it really was uncomfortable.)

haveyouseenlucky said...

Just as I was watching that clip, Eric walked into my office with cake. There were TWO cakes in the kitchen, one chocolate flavored and one pink flavored. .... HOT POCKET!

Hooray for your arm, you are FREE!

Scott said...

mmm buttafucco... i love to buttafucco ;-)

Hey Pretty said...

I'm constantly amazed by how narrow-minded people are about what constitutes an "appropriate" breakfast. Why is it totally cool for them to heat a side of a cow with fried eggs, yet my desire for some healthy lentil soup is not?

David Hasslehoff said...

Was that the best man from "Wedding Crashers" talking some cake? THAT'S SCHWEET!

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