Tuesday, May 1

Either The Sudafed is Kicking In Or Elliot Stabler's Nipples Are Staring At Me

How is this Zicam (you know, the goo you're supposed to "insert into your nasal cavity at the first signs of a cold to drastically reduce the duration and severity of the common cold") crap supposed to work if you already can't breathe through your nose? Um, hello? What if my first indication of said cold is a stuffy nose? Then what? Is a stuffy nose so out of the realm of the ordinary cold that you, a cold product industry that spends billions on research and marketing couldn't forsee this substantial roadblock to successful product delivery and implementation?

When you come out with a smokable or injectable version of this shit, let me know. For now, I'm left with no choice but to go back to moaning on the couch and waiting for the Sudafed that expired in '05 to kick in. At least now I get to moan about being sick and about blowing $11 on Zicam. Haven't seen such a useless product since the Tide-To-Go Stink Stick.

Stupid Zicam.



4 comments:

mineIsay said...

awesome title, a winner for sure. I hate to be the the one to tell you this, but all nipples are staring at you. You'll begin to see this as the sudafed kicks in. Have a Good Night!

Lori said...

OK that tide to go stink stick has saved several of Madison's outfits!!! :) Of course it's only used after the clothes have been taken off of her.. and to be tossed in the wash... hrm. ;)

Feel better hon!

S said...

why you gotta dis on the tide-to-go? that thing saved my hand-made italian tablecloth the one time i dared to eat on it.

but i so agree with the zicam thing. i'll take counter-intuitive products for $1000, alex!

feel better.

haveyouseenlucky said...

You just have to stick your head in a pot of boiling water first... or just close the door in your bathroom and run a hot shower for like twenty minutes while you sit on the terlet.