Friday, June 1

Department of Hate: June

For the entirety of May, 2007 at least two of the following three events were taking place:
  • I was sick
  • I was broken
  • I was on vacation
Based on the unpleasantness of every permutation encountered there, I figured June was likely to be an improvement. So far, in June:
  • My car has failed to start when I desired for it to do so.
  • Kitty #2 was ripped from my clutches departed.
  • My vacuum cleaner coughed up a hairball then rolled over and died in a puff of dander.
  • The medicine cabinet lept off of the wall and tried to take my scalp with it.
  • Chalked up an additional (mom fueled) failure at hanging the GODDAMNED STUPID ASSHOLE shades.
  • Crushed my broken elbow in my sleep.
  • Got blasted with work and acknowledgment from my boss that he is at least moderately aware of how very little I've been doing since bullet point #1 took place exactly one month ago today.
Adios May! Long live July!

7 comments:

R said...

One of your best posts!

DaGince said...

One of you best post...that was my comment...that damn R.

Try2Tri said...

aww...didn't know mom helped with blinds. Add that to the list of crap we have to do. Yes, I said we as in "i'll help" ;) lol!!

but what is this 'in June' the car hasn't started? thought that was May or are you just anticipating? =(

Carrie M said...

oh no...so sorry about your kitty, and just all the BS. July will be better. let's hope it's not as hot...HA!

mineIsay said...

i didn't get that that Mom helped put the curtains up, I think Mom just helped her feel horrible that she couldn't put the curtains up.

As always, a hysterical post which unfortunately stems from you experiencing miserable things.
:(

B said...

I'd like to see it as "Mom failed too"

Those things are a pain in the anus! But yes, sorry things aren't great but found a great saying on a blog:

"Be thankful for the things that you don't get, that you don't want."

~Bob Dylan

haveyouseenlucky said...

Your cat died?
:-(