Wednesday, March 15

The Ides Have It

Okay, I escaped. You can call off the dogs.

Let us review: Monday I passed out ten minutes after I got home and by the time VA Dillrod Beemer Lady let me out of the parking garage yesterday it was 8pm. Some 12 hours after I had arrived at work. Scarfed down some Moby around 9 then I went to bed. Which means, under no uncertain terms, that I simply *must* get back into the gym today. That and the apocalypse is upon us. What a raging mess this week has been. I had such plans! Such good intentions! Then there was sleep, and cars, and today... chocolate cake! Fuck me.

I don't know what the rest of this idle week has in store for me, but before the apocalypse wraps up, I am fervently and feverishly accepting any ideas regarding VA Dillrod Beemer lady and how to discommode her unapologetic and ungrateful ass for blocking me in last night for ALMOST FIVE HOURS. I so totally could have had her car towed but didn't because I'M TOO NICE.

That being said; my other new new years' resolution is to knock that shiat off.

I have her license plate, her first name, and a phone number (reverse look up won't fly). What say you?


NoodleP said...

You could insult her southern education, judging by her plate cover.

You could leave a nice note on her explaining that you like to leave at a certain time and the next time she will be towed at her expense.

Ask her if she is sleeping with a government offial in order to get a contract, which must be why she is working so late.

Ask her if she likes working on her back?

See if the parking attendent can stop her.

Drive Big Foot to work one day and squash it.

Write up a fake city ordinance and leave it on her windsheild and fine her for being publicly rude.

I would say eggs - but let's not go there.

Post a for sale sign on the car with her phone number on it.

Pam her windsheild.

OH BETTER YET - see if you can enlist a radio station to call her and tell her she has won something - but she can only claim her prize if she stops blocking people in their parking spaces or something of that nature.

But on the bright side of things - look at it this way - it is overtime. :-)

Joel said...

seriously!! get that shit towed!! welcome to life in the big doesn't start and stop at her convenience...