David Letterman's Top 10 Signs Your Boss Is Spying On You

10. Wherever you go you're followed by a potted plant in loafers.
9. The bracelet he gave you for Christmas beeps if you leave your cubicle.
8. Office coffee has hint of hazelnut and sodium pentothal.
7. Your name: "Sam." Next to your parking spot: "Reserved for the guy following Sam."
6. Find yourself getting tasered more than with previous bosses.
5. Your new secretary looks a lot like that chick from "Alias."
4. Instead of photos of wife and kids on his desk, he has a photo of you sleeping.
3. When you're alone in the men's room, a voice tells you to quit blocking the lens.
2. Boss critical of typos in your personal e-mails.
1. The fax machine just coughed.